IN HER THOUGHTS

It's cold outside, winter is here. It's time to bring out the beenie hats, scarfs, and winter boots. You can still slay according to any weather but how do you keep warm inside. I saw a post of someone saying it's getting cold outside and that triggered me. The thought of it sends shivers down my spine. How does one survive the fine-white veil? Some wait for a season but our inner self lives the longest mouthful winter awe. It got me thinking, how do people prepare to keep warm from the inside? Keep feelings pure and unclog hearts of all the hurt. Chase away bad monsters of anxiety and depression. With hearts like this - ice slides through her veins. How do you keep warm inside? Social media leaves behind a chilling bite, fueling anxiety blasting through our fears. Like chips of memories rising in the abys of COVID 19, to confront or be confronted? The demons from under the bed are out to play. Energetic from frozen popsicles. And we're there like a drained mother tryin...

She called my name out, I give up; Tears flooded in her eyes; They say eyes can't lie, the pain and sorrow pierced at the edge of her eyes; Out of them, tears of regret, pain, and questions; Why me? She asked all she wanted is to give her son the life she never had; The serpent had deceived her to eat the apple of trust; She roared lies and deception, words of betrayal beautifully crafted for destruction. It's always the ones close to you that walks you to your grave; They prepare your death-bed, shade crocodile tears - happy riddance tears and pretend sad - while their hearts itch with joy ; They thrive on pain, their thirst runs deep; Torn apart, at the edge of life and death; She was ready to let go into the dark swirling hole; She was ready to throw the towel in; She called out my name, I give up she said; The tremble in her voice was a sombre beat of helplessness; Sadness overwhelmed her soul. Only if I knew, only if I had texted her more; only if I had told her often I l...

Falling deeper and deeper into myself. With only a few keys on the keyboard to embrace my sorrow. To soothe my pain and wipe away these tears. At least they listen. Oh well, I would like to think so. I hope you don't walk out on me as well, for you have become my confession box. You know a little too much, my vulnerable parts and all this pain that keep me captive. So No! You are not going anywhere, You are stuck with this dark soul So turn up your brightest,  reduce your volume because I need all of your attention I need your emojis to hide this sadness. I need your games to escape this constant  knife that is piercing through my flesh I need You, I really you, My temporary escape. If I haven't told you yet in our countless words penned I appreciate you. I guess if you could talk back you would tell me to open up. But that's my biggest fear, what if you judge me? What if you walk away like they did? What if you turn deaf on me? The thought...