Being A Woman Is Now A Trigger Word!

 I'm More Than Just A Body

 “People talk about fight or flight all the time without realizing that the third option is 'freeze'. It kicks in when we are in a situation where we believe we cannot escape.” 

  I Wish I Was More Than Just A BODY

That was my first thought when I read a tweet shared of an ordeal a friend experienced through her boyfriend. One would run to think why didn’t the victim report herself, but saying the words, “I was raped” or even processing to convince yourself a person you called your lover would put you through such an ordeal is a bitter pill to swallow. But why is a woman’s body always in question? Some are bold enough to voice their unfiltered thoughts whilst others the thought always lingers, and the great social media where anybody can be anyone has only amplified them to be louder and louder. It’s one thing being treated nothing less than body parts, but the perpetrators being entitled to do so… That's disgusting.

No man! While at it let’s just cancel the whole generation and start over… I’m willing to be the Noah of our generation, imagine an ark of voices steered to for a greater.  That's definitely not us right now. Put that on your vision board. We deserve a better generation! We are tired of being stripped to the flesh, nailed arm to arm for everyone to cast a stone and spits. From a young age, our body is seen as something to regulate, comment and a matter for public opinion. Every moment it’s either shouts from windows catcalling or pit fights of words amongst ourselves of how slim or big, light or dark, short or tall, flat or curvy we should be. A competition with only sadness as the crown. Sad thing we end up thinking that’s all there’s to us. We live in fear, let's call it “a female sense of being watched” looking right-left, only this time it’s not a traffic light not only life but virtue depends on it.

"Maybe you should dress like this!" So, you start dressing to avoid comments. Sometimes you even think twice before going outside. There’s apparently no level of self-preservation or power that a woman can attain in order to escape the public jury. Time immemorial the media and social media has reduced big powerhouses to just body parts at their mercy. Remember the episodes of Michelle Obama or Ciara where their sexuality was questioned? Or let’s bring it close to home, the scrutiny on Samantha aka MisRed to just silenced voices of young woman violated and their crime is falling in love or the curse of the skirts.

“We don’t want to talk about our age, and we don’t want to act like we should look like we did when we were 20, you know? Well, I’m sorry men can look any kind of way. And it seems to be okay.” Michelle Obama. 

It’s a craze, men are body shamed and sexualized as well. But that’s a conversation we’re not ready for! Well, another article you will feast on soon, fingers crossed. Let’s be clear though it doesn’t take away from the issue at hand. We don’t strip one gender to compensate the other, we just rule out vileness regardless of gender. What’s wrong is wrong, period! Good, moving forward...

I’ve watched my sister gush over a body I loathe. Growing up I was told you grew boobs way too early. The most annoying part is that's the only thing my relatives gifted me after my father joined his maker. Of all the things, that was probably the one thing they offered me my whole life. Sounds trivial? But just imagine your one insecurity being on scrutiny, it breaks you. 

All I am saying is you never know one’s story just by 280 characters. I have seen women being reduced to hashtags. Just by being a woman, your vocabulary is don’t do this or you shouldn’t have done that. Recently, a trend #bussit showed just how we are at scrutiny. Posting on social media or a being a woman is not consent for scrutiny, being violated and God forbid rapping me. Your values are yours stop shoving them down other people's throat. You are not entitled to anything or anyone!

We are more than body parts! A starting point is to teach ourselves, Both Genders to value that people are human beings and deserving of respect, don't let your voice be someone's trigger.