Just Pull Out The Tooth That Aches & Throw It Away!

📷Tony Ross

Expectations!!! When you hear this word what is the first thing that comes to your mind? Take a second, breathe, if you have it, now ponder on it. Are they realistic? Do they have the next person at heart? The most important question is are they known? Every one of us has preconceived notions, resolutions, and most importantly expectations. While it is justified to hold expectations, it is especially detrimental when those who are expected to fulfil the expectations have no clue. It is nearly impossible for any person to fulfil unspoken expectations.

We all have certain expectations, we expect people to act in a certain way, at a specific time. But how can someone meet an expectation you didn't communicate? Be upfront of what you want, it may seem impossible but a pie in the sky is better than setting yourself up for a known hell. It only speeds up problems, set your relationships with people for failure and burn bridges with no chance of rectifying the situation. Don't succumb yourself to a life of pain, disappointments and hurt, just because you didn't have the courage to speak your mind. Just because they love you, work with you or are your blood doesn't mean they can assume or innately know what you expect of them.

Open your mouth & speak Or be stuck between a rock & a hard place!                             

What you set up yourself!  Three C's Output Of Assumptions

• Feeling so out it! The word is confusion.  If you expect something from someone you need to make your expectations clear. I don't know if you have realized how many misunderstandings you have had just because no one bothered to say as a friend, boss, partner or colleague that I expect you to do that or not do that.

• Black mood, drive up the wall! Conflict is inevitable. Stop having high hopes basing on unspoken expectations. This will only lead to internal frustration which is mobilized by fear, which clouds your view of things, people and the environment. In the end, you play victim to your villain narrative.

• Be down in the dumps! Of without hope & unhappy, Compromise and Broken Trust... Communication is key to any healthy relationship. If you have habits of playing hard to get and communicate your needs & expectations. Stop it!  I was listening to Ellis Brown motivational podcasts one of his words hit me, "If we have less self-love, we do not expect the best out  of life, but at the level, we see ourselves which less than we  deserve." Deep, think about it!

My 5 Favorite Slap Back Into Reality Quotes

“Ignorance is brought about by assumptions” ― T.D.Jakes

“Assumptions are made and most assumptions are wrong.” ― Albert Einsten

 “When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.”― Donald Miller

“The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.”  ― Eleanor Roosevelt

 “You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” ―  Mark Twain

Take time to ask & clarify. State, discuss and agree on expectations. Just saying it is not enough. There is a need for a common understanding of the parties involved. Another thing is just because you said it doesn't mean they agree with you or will adhere to it. So consistently follow through expectations. Keep standard of the agreement. Don't be moved by the wind & waver. Stay grounded and don't compromise yourself with unspoken expectations.