Body Insecurities, One Person’s Wow Can Be Another Person’s Ewww!

They say inner beauty is more attractive because it comes from within. But then why do we find ourselves feeling insecure about our bodies. Whether it’s due to acne, cellulite, excess weight, not being able to gain weight, accidents, feeling too tall, having a weird smile or being too pale, we all face our own insecurities. We look at our bodies and nit-pick at every little thing that doesn’t seem to measure up to “perfection.” The term simply stems from the word Body image which simply means a person's subjective perceptions of the aesthetics or sexual attractiveness of their own body. It involves how a person sees themselves, compared to the standards that have been set by society. Hence, the issue of body shaming or body dissatisfaction.

Body insecurity is a sensitive and controversial topic. It’s either the perpetrator lacks awareness of the damage or has no ounce of remorse or people normalize bullying or victims have double standards on what should be regarded as insecurity. I’m going to focus on the latter because I feel the topic is always swept under the rag. It’s fair and fine when we acknowledge no one perfect, but, it’s a hot mess when one now disregards other people’s discomfort just because they are ‘perfect’ according to their perspective.

It’s so funny how the person you are dying to be, can also have their own insecurities. For instance, before writing this blog I had a survey where I asked my followers about their insecurities. I received some responses, but one, in particular, baffled me. I was having a conversation and I asked a colleague of mine what their insecurities were. Well, they flat out said no, and it was understandable since it's sensitive but that’s not the point. It became a whole conversation when she flat out refused I had my own. The sassy-voice in my mind kept on saying, “pssh you definitely don’t know me” how could you so convinced I wouldn’t have one. It raised some questions in me:

• What’s the indicator to differentiate people who are or who are not supposed to have insecurities?
•  How can you judge just from the appearances that are visible to you?
•  Why do you feel the need to disregard the next person’s feelings?

The moral of the story is to always leave room for someone to be themselves. Stop shoving your thoughts, insecurities, and everything in between down their throats especially when we become so self-critical that we have self-entitlement to rule off what qualifies as insecurity or not. The definition explains it as a self-problem. See! It’s a You and the person in the mirror problem. Stop projecting or having double standards.

I did a little survey to show the diversity and here is what some people expressed as their body insecurities:

T: Whenever I try to wear my tight-fitting clothes I have to breathe in.  Or when taking pictures, I have to ask the photographer is my stomach tucked in well. And I have been doing the plank plan and drinking water.

M: I don’t like my boobs, they are all fine when wearing a bra and pushed up but when I remove it it’s a different story. My boyfriend always assures me they are perfect but I don’t feel comfortable. Why aren't they plump and do they have to look so placid? I have been doing exercises hopefully it changes things so I can have my full confidence.

S: I fell when I was 5 from a tree and hurt my leg, since the accident I haven’t been able to walk properly. I feel like every time people are scaring me and the worst part is there is nothing I can about it.

After all the contributions it dawned on me that it’s important to remember that everybody is different. We all naturally have different body types so always remember your special qualities and there is more than just the physical.

To make it simple, remember these keys to an ideal body:

• Treat your body with respect.
• Give it enough rest.
• Fuel it with a healthy variety of foods.
• Exercise moderately.
• Resist the pressure to judge yourself and others based on weight, shape, or size.
• Respect people based on the qualities of their character and accomplishments, rather than just because of their appearance.