IN HER THOUGHTS

If i say i don't miss you i would be lying I hear your voice in a crowd calling for me Sometimes i think you are lost waiting to be found With open arms stretched out to give you a warm embrace Truly when a prodigal son returns, a father rejoices So will I... For that little time you have been anchored into my soul It's unfortunate God had other plans, a nd you had none Only if you acted more than you talked Maybe you would be right here with me I do miss you, the way you knew when something was wrong Or the acts of service I swear that was your love language And i loved it too I miss the goofiness and the way i laughed with no restraint nor shame I loved how i was when i was around you I'm grateful you made me experience this one of kind of love Somewhat close to normal from this world filled with greed and competition to show each other who cares less So if say i don't miss you i would be lying to myself

I need more time in a day, I have so many ideas and aha moments, I recently bought a diary, i jot them down one by one, That way they can last a lifetime, Hopefully manifest in the near future and not be engulfed by dust mites. I need more time in a day, To make a mark, to prove my worth, to establish my relevance, So many plans, so many dreams, I hope i will not make my gravesite an expensive site of unrealised dreams of BEING; A mother A writer An entrepreneur An explorer A storyteller A lover And some dreams i haven't realised yet. I really wish had more time in a day.

A feeling so pure and fulfilling, I have been in love before We underrate finding a soul that compliments yours intentionally You are in sync, everything just flows It doesn't feel forced When you meet the vultures that are always looming around for their next prey Ready to pounce on your flesh and leave you unrecognisable You will understand the intensity of pure love I have been in love before, it is different kind of feeling

I believed her when she said she was leaving Being at the mercy of everyone is never a good sight Words from all directions, blowing you like a paper in the wind Spinning and spinning, sucking the sanity out of you Eventually you will lose it, and leaving is the only way out So when she cleared her desk and bid farewell I bet it felt like the Mandela walk from prison or when Desmond Tutu won a Nobel peace prize I saw a woman drawing her last strength I saw hope that i can also stand up for myself She has had enough of being mensplained, undervalued, disregarded and sidelined. Power to her So when she said i'm leaving i believed her. I saw a WIN

I’m not sure if I will ever post this one, but when I do know tables are going to be shaken. Probably a few blocked or why the hell did you do that. But well, here it goes. You got a girl messed up, why would you bring another lady though. Friend, sister of a friend or whatever in between, that isn’t right. There’s a code to these things, don’t make a girl look stupid or surprised. Yeah, I’m a sucker for surprises, but this right here, no man it’s not screwed on right. Rewind… I met this guy two weeks prior through a friend. Let’s call him John Doe, we were getting to know each other. Conversations on the phone and calls too (insert blush imoji). Everything was going well, pretty much it showed we were both interested in getting to know each other. It was a done deal, signed, sealed and delivered. If you ask me! Dreamy right? He brought my favourite chocolates and marshmallows when we first met. Girl I was like take me already. Haha kidding, in my mind though c'mon boy was paying

I never thought it could be me; My heart dropped, I couldn't breath Everything froze, I could hear voices from a distance I fell down five feet where only my thoughts -re grets and shame haunted me more than the thought it was me I promised myself as a little girl, grow up and always take care of yourself Was so blameless, it seemed attainable for a girl that was driven by goals Or was it stubbornness that I had to be better Abounded at 2, I promised myself I will never need my oppressors That I will never confirm their vile thoughts against me That I had the willpower to write my own story Now years later all I have is tears of regret, replaying scenarios of how I could have done it better. The next thing I remember  I was gasping for air as if my life depended on it My sheets drenched in a pool of sweat, my crooked lips parted with a shout for help That's when I realised it was only a dream I promised myself this particular dream I will never make it come to true.

Ouch! That hurts. Why did you have to do that? To instill wisdom in that thick head of yours. Why did you go behind my back about my illness?  What did you have me do? You left me with no option. You chose to hide in your head and shut me out. I wanted to help. I really did but you made helping you so hard. I had to tell him about it. After all he is your fiance, were you going to keep it from him forever? I had to do what a good best friend does - meddling in your business and am not sorry I did it if at all doing that is helping you. So, if doing it again will earn me another knock on my head then well go ahead. Am so done with you. I hate having a snitch as a best friend. Oh my! That hurt so bad. I felt my legs being lifted off the ground into the air and then brought down again at a pace I could not handle which made me clutch to the ground for support. It was too much to comprehend. Why would Latavia do this to me? I was only trying to help her. She has been having too many episod