The Beauty Of Speaking Last: Here's To A Better You!

The art of listening is yet to be mastered by many people. We walk with placards on our heads that literally say, 'hear me, but I really don't care what you have to say'. Many leaders, individuals and even our bosses lack that. The moment they get into a room it is all about what they expect and usually, everything is already laid out. But then again, how do you expect an open conversation when there are already strict guidelines on what to talk about?  There is a huge difference between giving direction and taking over the whole narrative. Sometimes approaches prove having a position doesn't make someone a leader.

The moment you state out 'what is' and 'what is not' you have already taken the power out of their tongue and replaced it with 'Can this interrogation be over already'. Oh well, that's wrong, it should be a conversation, an exchange, not completely one-sided. Once one person dominates, it's no longer one and you can kiss goodbye a healthy exchange. Reevaluate your communication skills, maybe the problem is always speaking above everyone. Learn to speak last and listen to know exactly what you need.

Before you speak always ask yourself:

• Is it necessary?

• Is it constructive?

• Is it well thought out?

Always take a deep breath before you speak or respond no matter how urgent the answer or question might look. When you learn to let others speak before you, you see what you want, see what stands in your way and what value you might bring to the table. Allow everyone to speak (take input, ask questions to better understand where their perspective is coming from. In the end, everyone feels heard and you get all their contributions.

Speaking last isn't bad after all, you get to:

• Think before you speak

• Process what other people are saying

• You will only say what is important. (why waste time talking about things that don't matter or deserve your energy?)

• You will have all your facts right before decision time  (you absorb info and have a well-rounded opinion on the outcome)

• Value people's opinions

“Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.”  Benjamin Franklin