#WinterABC2020: Of Being In My Classroom| Call Me The Plug!

I’m not going to lie this topic caught me off guard. What can I possibly teach? For some reason the first thing I did what call my sister to ask what can I possibly teach and what do I know that people would stop whatever they are doing and listen? Strange but yeah. It hit me the reason why called wasn’t a question of she knows me or not but she is a teacher at heart. Well, to me I could say! Not in the classroom sense. But in the life sense. There always a lesson or a skill she would teach me. She literally knows everything. She taught how to sleek my edges, beat my face, cook, conversational skills, I could go on and on. She can get down to the bottom of things, get back up all that easily, so she taught me the importance of exploring more options. I realized anyone can learn how to do anything.

That was the AHA moment, the truth is, how you teach doesn’t matter that much. The beauty is in what people can learn. I was just being hard on myself as usual, and yeah, I have heard this a couple of times. Stop overthinking, and I did. I asked myself these questions:

What come easily to me?

What do I do willingly?

What activities do I enjoy doing?

It took me the whole week to figure out what I was going to write about. Literally, I was struggling, I have always been an average student. Suffice to say, I thought I should be the last person to teach anyone anything. However, I have seen I’m a goodlistener/understanding. I’m an unofficial therapist to my friends and family. You can call me a counsellor, possibly why all my articles take that form. I do Humanistic Therapy, which is simply emphasizing people’s capacity to make rational decisions and develop their maximum potential. Concern, care and interest! I jump right in and always ready to listen. Which turns out well. Surprisingly well. My blog is exhibit 1.

Welcome to my class! I’m teaching you the art of listening…

All you need is knowledge, patience and interest! It doesn’t matter whether you are a graduate or not. I was researching on learning how to teach so I don’t blow this up. The important thing l noted was, “When teachers teach, they help a learner learn.” There’s need to connect with the readers (shared a personal story about my sister) and making it relevant (listening as an essential skill right now). I'm ticking boxes, not bad right! We are about to get into the latter.

Here Is Reason Why You Should learn Listening!

How often are REALLY listening? We engage people on a regular every minute and hour. Yet many people lack effective listening skills, especially active listening. Why?

Builds trust and respect: It shows you care and interested in what people around you are saying. I’m a person who loves attention, it rubs different for someone to drop everything and listen. When you don’t communicate with people you tend to assume what someone is thinking and feeling. Which I used to do a lot. Guilty as charged. But I learned my lesson and I hope you do it.

You understand people better: One in ten people have said, “You really don’t understand.” Basically, they were saying you don’t listen. If you listened you would understand. After this lesson, go to that person you quickly dismiss and label aggressive at work, listen to them and allow yourself to gain insight from what they say and coming from. You will thank me later; it changes your perspective at things.

We All Want To Be Heard and Understood!

Growing up I was the quiet one and felt neglected. Blame on me, I wouldn’t complain, my basic need to feel understood was non-existent. I learned communication is key, verbal and non-verbal, people will listen. The reason why I LISTEN, no one should EVER feel that way.

Steps To Effective Listening

• Maintain eye contact. If you have heard, “Look at me when I’m talking to you” from your parents it was a way to instil effective listening skills. Just put aside the phone and other distractions.

• Be attentive and relaxed. Be present, give attention and pay attention. Don’t be distracted by your thoughts, feelings or biases.

• Keep an open mind. Listen to understand not to judge, don’t jump to conclusions. Don’t be a sentence-grabber. For me, I freeze if I’m interrupted and not allowed to finish my sentences. I go blank and lose the zeal to engage. Well, I’m learning patience! Don’t follow your line of thought, wait it out and listen.

• Listen to words and create scenarios. Put yourself in the situation being communicated and line of thought. Don’t spend time planning what to say next, think only about what the person is saying.

• Pay attention to what isn’t being said, to nonverbal cues. There are cues you can ignore – expression around eyes, the set of the mouth and slope of shoulders.

That’s all for today’s lesson! Homework: What is something you think you could do to be a better listener? What is something you are constantly told to improve? If there’s something you can teach me as well, share in the comment below!